Has it Been a Tough Year?

  The old year has passed and many plan to start 2020 with the intention of heading into a space
  of new beginnings. Was 2019 filled with professional difficulties, physical
  or mental health concerns, loss, relational conflict or poor decisions? Even
  if 2019 was great, are there things you might like to introduce into your
  life or build upon? So how does one go about acknowledging the old, owning
  its reality, and moving forward?

  The first step is mapping out what went right for you and what didn't go so
  well. Take stock of the past year and be honest with yourself about which
  decisions were helpful and which not so much. Note the events that you had
  some control over and surrender to those that you did not. Then acknowledge
  and honor your effort whether they were successful or not, and then commit to
  letting 2019 go. 

  When thinking about new beginnings, starting fresh, new year resolutions or
  goals, many people, including myself, will talk about how to set realistic,
  small goals, and how to positively reinforce yourself in order to move
  towards what you ultimately want. People talk about how to avoid repeating
  the same mistakes or how to avoid sabotaging the achievement of one's own
  goals. These are all valuable and very useful tools to have; however, I am sure
  that you have heard it before and there is one crucial component of all of
  these steps that further needs to be highlighted. This essential piece of the
  puzzle is the ability to be present in the moment regardless of what your
  feelings, thoughts, or sensations may be--mindfulness. If you can stay
  present during each moment that you are trying to move towards your ultimate
  goal, you will be much more likely to meet all of your smaller goals along
  the way. So lets talk about how to be mindful during this time of transition
  to a new year! 

I am positive that many of you reading have heard about mindfulness before. The word has been used as a "buzz" word over the past few years and some people may incorrectly understand it as a
fad. The reality is that mindfulness has been around for thousands of years and
still serves us well today. The question for us as this new year unfolds is,
"how can I be mindful and stay present during each step of my ladder
towards my goals?"

Oftentimes the biggest barrier towards achieving our goals is stress. People
get anxious about their ability to succeed, about how to handle the pressures
being presented to them in the moment, and ultimately get distracted, make
mistakes, or give up. Mindfulness doesn't eliminate stress but research has
found that it changes the ways in which people relate to the stress. For
example, can one recognize the stressor, say "hello stressor" and
then continue to stay engaged in the task at hand. This is a learned skill that
takes practice and commitment but it is a skill that is open to anyone. It may
be difficult in the beginning but becomes easier with time.  

Even if there is no stressor in the moment, learning how to stay mindful and
present will make you more efficient and involved with your goals. You will be
able to more easily transition from what you were doing in the past so that you
can be able to focus on the present. This is a form of letting go. This doesn't
mean that you wont find your mind wandering to things from the past but you
will be better equipped to acknowledge your thoughts or feelings, and to then
refocus on the present moment. 

Practicing mindfulness is not a skill one learns by lecture or traditional
education but rather requires the active practice of it. There are many ways to
cultivate a mindfulness practice. One can download apps that guide you through
various mindfulness exercises. There are also workshops that one can sign up
for or meditation groups people can join. Some people like to buy books and
read about mindfulness first and then give practicing on their own a try.
Exploring a combination of methods is always helpful as different things work
for different people What might you try?

No matter what 2019 was like for you, whether it was great or a struggle,
acknowledge it, say goodbye to it, and turn your attention to the present.
After all, the present will become your future. Honor the moment and if the
moment is difficult know that, that too will pass.

Happy 2020!